Had consultations with USC and UCLA last week... Looking like UCLA will do the deed. We actually liked them a lot. Penciled in for 11-9... I got that call today. Although I wouldn't wish this on anyone, I know I am very fortunate under the circumstances, and am looking forward to getting the ball rollin'. Probably be there for a week and then home after that.
Anyways, thought about ya and wanted to bring you up to speed on my latest shenanigans.
I cant find it in any of the letters so far. But one of the little miracles or wonders from around that time was the mysterious white cat that appeared, in the bushes under the avocado tree, in the back yard. She was very standoffish for months. Wouldn't let me approach her. But she didn't leave. She sort of stayed in the yard and watched over me from a distance as I sat on the back porch recovering from my first surgery, drinking coffee in the mornings, pondering what was happening to me. I would pray for guidance sitting on that porch. The timing of the appearance of the little white cat seemed to represent the possible presence of angels. Maybe she was one of them.
Funny, at the time I was anxiously awaiting news of finding a 'Mentor Angel', from the Imerman Angels organization. I didn't recognize that angels were already showing up.
I started this blog post with a letter I wrote and sent out to friends. I was staying in touch with friends via e-mails for the most part. In the background there was a lot going on that I couldn't possibly have shared with all my friends then. I was reviewing these letters tonight and realize that period was a whirlwind, or maybe more of an onslaught, of information and emotions as "the deed" loomed. The 'deed' I reference in that letter was the liver-resection surgery.
With some friends I'd talk about spiritual matters. Some of my friends were Veterans with whom I'd share, an often times dark sense of humor, or cavalier attitudes with. Lots of my friends were sympathetic and would offer encouragement, support, and advice. A couple guys I corresponded with were cancer survivors themselves. I needed and appreciated all of them.
I also had e-mails from this period dealing with pragmatic issues. Some dealing with my plight, and some just interchanges of things that go on in everyday life. When you are in the cancer thing, you still gotta do regular life too... An e-mail from the wonderful people in the HR Department at work who gave me tremendous help in negotiating health and disability insurance issues. A letter from a friend who had just escaped getting trapped on the east coast by a huge storm. Kevin my songwriter buddy corresponded with me about having me sit-in with his band to play some slide. A message I sent to a friend pertaining to the growing movement among Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans, who were trying to raise awareness of illness in servicemembers, who were sickened by toxic or environmental exposures downrange. An e-mail with the attorneys who were preparing my Living Trust, Power of Attorney, etc... That message was titled "Estate Draft Plans". An odd mix. Messages of day to day activities, mixed in with plans and correspondences pertaining to medical things and procedures, or even what to do in the event of my death.
Cancer does have a way of boiling it all down. Here's an excerpt from a message Oct. 25th 2012 from my friend Thom who was going thru treatment himself.
"...Look at this situation as getting a "heads up" on how we should be living our lives, by the moment and in the moment. You heard it before, but it is true, "all we truly have is this moment."..."
You, dear reader, have presumably heard this before too. I certainly had. But sometimes in the hustle and bustle of life, even to this day, I can easily loose sight of this. Well, if this sentiment about 'living in the moment' is 'The Nail'... Then cancer, cancer is, 'The Hammer'. It has a way of driving this point home.
Two weeks later, I would be checking in to UCLA's Ronald Regan Hospital. In the wake of that I'd make the first of my acquaintances who are Gallbladder Cancer survivors.
In the next entry in the series, I prepare myself for the liver resection surgery:
And I'd eventually get to finally meet the angel cat in person. And then another angel joined the gang!
Angels among us.
Music scene slideshow of me and a few of my friends who I corresponded with.
If you liked this article, check out the previous entry's in the series: